The INTJ Tribe

“Know Thyself.”

It pays to know what type you belong to, in order to understand yourself better.

INTJs believe in constant growth in relationships, and strive for independence for themselves and their mates. They are constantly embarking on “fix-up” projects to improve the overall quality of their lives and relationships. They take their commitments seriously, but are open to redefining their vows, if they see something which may prove to be an improvement over the existing understanding. INTJs are not likely to be “touchy-feely” and overly affirming with their mates or children, and may at times be somewhat insensitive to their emotional needs. However, INTJs are in general extremely capable and intelligent individuals who strive to always be their best, and be moving in a positive direction. If they apply these basic goals to their personal relationships, they likely to enjoy happy and healthy interaction with their families and friends.

INTJ Strengths

* Not threatened by conflict or criticism
* Usually self-confident
* Take their relationships and commitments seriously
* Generally extremely intelligent and capable
* Able to leave a relationship which should be ended, although they may dwell on it in their minds for awhile afterwards
* Interested in “optimizing” their relationships
* Good listeners

INTJ Weaknesses

* Not naturally in tune with others feelings; may be insensitive at times
* May tend to respond to conflict with logic and reason, rather than the desired emotional support
* Not naturally good at expressing feelings and affections
* Tendency to believe that they’re always right
* Tendency to be unwilling or unable to accept blame
* Their constant quest to improve everything may be taxing on relationships
* Tend to hold back part of themselves

INTJs are not naturally in tune with their own feelings, or with what other people are feeling. They also have a tendency to believe that they are always right. While their self-confidence and esteem is attractive, their lack of sensitivity to others can be a problem if it causes them to inadvertantly hurt their partner’s feelings. If this is a problem for an INTJ, they should remember to sometimes let their mate be the one who is right, and to try to be aware of the emotional effect that your words have upon them. In conflict situations, INTJs need to remember to be supportive to their mate’s emotional needs, rather than treating the conflict as if it is an interesting idea to analyze.

Romantically, the INTJ enjoys thinking about intimacy, and about ways to perfect it. In positive relationships, their creativity and intensity shine through in this arena. In more negative relationships, they might enjoy thinking about romance more than actually doing it. They’re likely to approach intimacy from a theoretical, creative perspective, rather than as an opportunity to express love and affection. Although, the INTJ who has learned the importance of these kinds of expressions to the health of their relationship is likely to be more verbally affectionate.

INTJs are able to leave relationships when they’re over, and get on with their lives. They believe that this is the right thing to do. They may have more difficulty accomplishing the task than they like to exhibit to other people.

INTJs are highly intense, intelligent people who bring a lot of depth and insight into most major areas of their life. In terms of relationships, their greatest potential pitfall is the tendency to think about things rather than doing them, and their difficulty reconciling reality with their inner visions. INTJs are likely to be in positive, healthy relationships, because they’re likely to leave relationships which aren’t working for them (unless other circumstances prohibit that).

Courtesy of  this page.

The kind to dwell in my own world, 70%. Silent, watching, churning ideas all the time.

Anyway, we are all different. =))

Virtue In Friendship

There are people we meet that are quickly gone. There are some who stay and leave their imprints in our life, making us feel better about ourselves, giving us an idea that there is really something to gain from friendships. This encounter leaves us a changed person. We are not the same as we were before, never.

For unknown reasons some people come into our lives, some easy to leave behind, some cherished. Some people quickly fade away, some stay. We are drawn to people who mirror us. We keep them who know how to encourage, we trash them who are casual and temporary, them who we think have only used us for their own selfish ends. Some appreciate us, and there are those who put us down. We are always seeking for people who validate us, whether we may admit that or not. It is indeed a good fortune to find a friendship that is based on pleasant experiences and goodness, than the one that was bred for mere utility.

Friendship with affection, it is rare, as all excellent things are. It is virtue after all, that gives harmony and permanence to friendships.

Tara

Happily Married

An interesting story on how to stay happy while married. =)

A man and a woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife’s bedside.

She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box. When he opened it, he found two crocheted dolls and a stack of money totaling $95,000. He asked her about the contents.

“When we were to be married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doll.”

The little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two precious dolls were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness.

“Honey,” he said “that explains the doll, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?”

“Oh, that?” she said. “That is the money I made from selling the dolls.”

Work Matters

Ei, it’s been a very busy week for me. What about that?

There has been some shift in the things that I do in the office. Aside from writing, I am actually doing onsite optimization.

I wouldn’t know how to feel, but it’s kinda overwhelming for me.  Just wished they’d have given me time to do my reading before I do the actual part hee-hee!

As far as I know, I have passed the week with my composure intact. Well, looking ahead to Monday when I would have to do 60k links on a site, and let the program do its job. It can take 4 hours to do that.

Still, I’m not as confident as when I do writing, but I’ll get by. A trainor/boss is there to guide me through all the technical process, and that person would have to be patient with me. *grin